Are the unspoken rules of the workplace serving you as a leader?
Have you ever noticed that every place you go, group you join, or employer you work for, has unspoken ‘rules’ about how things are done? Sometimes you can even notice them at the very beginning. Depending on how these rules align with your values, you may feel any of the following:
- Some resistance or discomfort
- Be entirely unbothered and begin to adapt
- Reluctantly conform
- Find comfort in having a clear cut set of rules to follow
An example would be an unspoken dress code where everyone wears similar things (mostly black, or jeans with a shirt, etc.). These rules aren’t company policy; but they are taught by co-workers to new staff. Your compliance will often determine how quickly you are accepted into the workplace. In academic terms, these are called normative rules.
What are Unspoken Rules?
These unspoken or normative rules are the “way things are done around here” in every office environment. They are the standard that has been set for things like dress code, lunch breaks, meeting cadence, tardiness, and more. You won’t find these in any company handbook as they’re often determined collectively by the long-term staff and passed down to the new employees over time. You likely won’t even be able to trace these unspoken rules back to their source.
While they’re often harmless, there can sometimes be issues with the fact that these rules are unspoken, can be negative and are often left uncontested out of fear of rejection from the group.
These rules often go unnoticed by leaders when they consider changes, making them difficult to identify and even harder to change. This can hinder a transformational leader’s efforts to be more innovative, flexible, and responsive.
How Do They Impact Company Culture?
Normative rules are comforting to those within the existing group, and they are often left unquestioned. The only time they’re contested is when someone takes a stand because these behaviours clash with their personal values. An example would be the role of women or people of colour in the workplace.
The behaviour of excluding people because of their gender, culture, or race is known to be wrong, and yet it continues if enough people turn a blind eye. The same applies to issues that are less controversial and obvious.
The problem occurs when you are offended or excluded by these rules and have no clear way to combat or change them. They aren’t written, and to challenge them is to risk a loss of acceptance or even greater exclusion from the group.
These unspoken normative rules have likely been around for a long time, and people who are now senior adopted them and expect you to do the same. Rules that you find unacceptable today may not have been when they were originally put into place. While that is a common occurrence, it doesn’t make it right.
As a leader, you must be able to identify your business’s normative rules and ensure that they align with a positive company culture. Employees that aren’t happy with the company culture are 24% more likely to quit.
Identifying Normative Rules in Your Workplace
I ask you –
What are the unspoken rules in the groups you engage in?
Can you identify what you accept as normal behaviour?
Can you objectively determine whether or not these behaviours are acceptable to your entire staff?
Do you remember when you first began in your workplace? Were there processes or patterns of behaviour that unsettled or surprised you? If yes, there is a good chance these were probably the normative ‘unspoken’ rules you were shown you needed to comply with for acceptance and future success.
One way to evaluate the unspoken rules in your workplace is to try and put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Imagine you’re a new employee or someone with a different background, culture, or gender than you. Would that employee feel comfortable with the normative rules within your business? Would they be a good culture fit among the rest of your team?
If your answer is “no”, I challenge you today to ask yourself – ‘Why not?’
In your answer, you may find some flaws in the unspoken rules of your workforce. You might see how these rules can negatively impact your perception of others or how they may not feel entirely appropriate and welcoming as newcomers.
I am not interested in whether your rules are right or wrong, as that answer comes from the law and your own personal values. What I hope is that this article has opened your eyes and helped you realise that these unspoken rules do exist within your business. As a transformational leader, you are either accepting them and being supported by them, or they may be the reason you never quite feel like you belong.
Don’t Compromise your Values as a Leader
Regardless, I implore you to ask yourself:
“What is the impact of these unspoken rules among my team?
How do these rules serve me as a leader today and in the future?
How does my compliance impact the company culture?”
When answering these questions, envision the type of leader you wish to become or be known for. Are there unspoken rules stopping you from achieving that, or do they support your personal leadership vision?
Finally, if you know in your heart that these rules are negative and have created an environment that isn’t welcoming to everyone, don’t beat yourself up for being compliant. Instead, ask yourself what you can do to make positive changes.
The most influential voices come from those who are part of the group and want to change it. This is a form of transformational leadership. I encourage you to really take the time to evaluate your company culture. Respect and embrace the diverse personalities among your team and honour your values in the actions you take.
If you would like support in working through this, we would be happy to assist you. Reach out by booking a free meeting with us.
Author Bio
Deborah Knight is the founder of Xsead Lead with a background in organisational and individual leadership and executive coaching.
As a coach, Deborah aims to create an inclusive and respectful space where individuals and organisations can do the work necessary for growth and change. She is also passionate about helping women be valued for themselves while also contributing and being successful.
Apart from her company which she is deeply passionate about, Deborah also loves bushwalking, reading, travelling, and learning new things.
For any coaching or organisational support enquiries Deborah can be contacted via email: info@xseedlead.com.au or via her company website which is www.xseedlead.com.au.
